He decided that the guy was pursuing me," she says.Rachel realized from that incident that no one but the sender truly understands messages' context and that words easily can be misconstrued.8. If you notice your husband in the arms of another woman in a photo, it's natural to draw a conclusion, admits Spira. Even Facebook founder Mark Zuckerburg's status recently went from single to married.So post your anniversary dinner photo together or a picture from a recent vacation," she says.Always talk to your spouse in person about anything online that bugs you.Try something like: "I noticed a post from Jennifer on your wall, but I don't remember you mentioning her. " Be direct, and you won't come across like you're firing off accusations. You gotta suss them out - you may find something interesting. Make sure to NEVER to tell your 'mutual friend' about the date.
"Let him explain why they're friends," recommends Spira.
"While you might share a toothbrush, a little privacy and mystery is good for a marriage." So even if you know each other's logins, you should feel like you never have to use it.3. People rarely have pure intentions when they seek out exes, says Orlando.
His simple advice: "Defriend, disassociate, disengage." That's because the protection of the Internet allows for more forward conversation, points out Karen Sherman, Ph D, relationship specialist and author of Seeing what an old friend is up to, though, is part of the fun of Facebook, she adds.
Orlando agrees, adding that not mentioning your husband is the online equivalent of not wearing your wedding band.2. Elizabeth Hanes of Albuquerque, NM, says she and her husband, Lee, know each other's logins to everything, but not so they can snoop on each other.
"It shows that neither of us have anything to hide," she says. "Once, a friend posted something inappropriate to Lee's wall, but he couldn't access Facebook from work so he asked me to delete the post for him," she says.