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Sores can appear around the mouth, on the genitals, on the thighs, or buttocks, etc.The recurrence of herpes outbreaks is variable—but they always reappear in the same site. You can get herpes tested by a primary care physician or at a health clinic.Staying in a relationship where you are negative and they are positive seems like playing with fire.But there’s something to be said for someone who knows they have herpes and knows how to manage it versus someone who has herpes and doesn’t know and has never been tested. Garrison, a clinical sexologist, told Primer: “When a person living with herpes knows everything about herpes and can comfort themselves and educate their partners, when they can know their prodrome and understand what that means, when they are aware of what can trigger their outbreaks, then sex with them can be (and often is! That being said, you'll never reduce your risk of contracting herpes from a partner down to zero. There are three ways to reduce the risk of transmission.That virus can (but may not) be transmitted to any surface of someone else’s body, via physical contact.If it does transmit, there’s an ~80% chance that they won’t recognize any symptoms from the infection.

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HSV-2 is the one usually responsible for genital herpes.

Bottom-line: Is a long term relationship with someone with herpes a life sentence for protected sex?

Or is contracting herpes from your partner going to be an inevitability—not a matter of if, but when? I'm not going to sit here and guarantee that you'll never get herpes, either from your long term girlfriend or from a random hookup.

Q: I've been seeing this girl and we've really been hitting it off. But my gut reaction is to ghost and never look back—I don't want herpes! – Jason, San Antonio A: Finding out your partner has herpes can be a bombshell at any point in the relationship. But it is not nearly as unique or earth-shattering as you think it is. I know there a lot of thoughts and anxieties swirling in your head—about your partner’s health, about your health, about your partner’s fidelity, about your future (or lack thereof) with your partner—and we’ll get to all that.

My head tells me to handle this like a mature gentleman.

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